Happy Halloween!!

I've been trying for 10 minutes to get a picture on here from Etsy of the costume that sugar is wearing. I have been unsuccessful so far. Really, I'm not usually this dumb.

Anyway, I miss blogging but I just never have the time for it. I don't know how to blog from my iphone but if I did, maybe I'd blog more. I don't know. I tweet a lot (@shoeaddict17) because I usually have lots of one liners in me. I comment on tv a lot because I like to comment and usually don't have anyone to comment to.

So- Halloween. I've had a migraine since last night. It's finally not I-want-to-die bad. All last night, I honestly thought I was dying and hoped that I might. I couldn't get comfortable. I couldn't sleep, watching tv was difficult and my phone was dying. Yeah, my phone will not charge any where but in my car. So, that's fun. It's been a pretty crappy few days.

We are going to my bro and sis-in-law's house tonight. Sugar is going in an adorable Cookie Monster costume that I love (and hope I can resell for next year) but it's big and I"m not putting her in it until it's time to go do the deal. She does say "trick or treat" though it sounds more like "tricker & tricker treat." Whatev.

She's whining right now for me to "wock wock" which means to hold her and rock her. Oh this is going to be a fun night!!

September

I never wanna blog when I have not in awhile because I feel like I can't just pick up where I am now, I have to talk about everything that's happened between then and now. Well, I'm just going to skim.

From the Tuesday after Labor Day until that Sunday, Sugar and I went to Panama City Beach, Florida. The bank that my SIL works has a condo and the employees each get a turn to use it. She invited us to meet her and a friend down there and we accepted. It's about a 7 hour drive from here to there but I've made that trip many times and it's not bad. Sugar slept most of the way and we only listened to The Wiggles for 2 hours! WIN.

If you've ever been to the beach with a toddler (or baby), I'm sure you're aware that you don't get much outside/beach time. That's fine with me because I'm prepared for that. I think that's the main thing to know when going. Don't expect to go and do what you did before kids, be happy to be there and take what you can get. The water was pretty rough in the gulf the first few days so we didn't even try to swim. The pool water was pretty cold, too.

All in all, good trip. We went shopping and ate out at cool places and really, those are my fav things to do. My MIL came on the Friday. BIG BIG SIGH. I'll just refrain.

Sugar started Mother's Day Out the Monday after we got back. I was most nervous about carpool drop off because I was unsure of where to go and because they come and get her from your car. I DID NOT want to cry in front of her and that's what I prayed I wouldn't do. I was given the option to park my car and bring her inside but I didn't think that would be best for either of us. Monday morning, I packed her lunch in her super cute lunchbox, dressed her in her

super cute dress, took some pictures and we were on our way.

I'll try to post pictures of her soon. No promises.

Anyway, we got to school about 20 minutes early because I wasn't sure how long it'd take us to get there. Turns out, not long. I ended up in the wrong carpool lane and was embarrassed (even though the ladies were very sweet) and had to go around. At our school, when you pull in, you park and unbuckle your child(ren) so that when the teachers come around, they just get the kid and the book bag and go. This made things better for me because all this time, I'd been thinking that I'd put her into her seat at home and then someone would take her out the back at school. And I wouldn't be able to touch her before. I know it sounds crazy and I'm not explaining it right but it was what was keeping me up at night.

When we finally were in the correct line, I unbuckled her and put her in the front with me. She thought she was the bees knees up there. We talked about school (skoo) and her teacher Miss Kelly and all her friends (prends). When they started coming to get the kids, her teacher's aid, who we'd met at open house, came to get her. I was SO thankful that Miss Patti was there to get her. I'd also been so afraid of someone we'd never met coming to get her. All my prayers were answered and while I DID sob (saying out loud in my car that they better take care of my baby) for about 10 minutes after she was gone, I did not cry in front of her.

She loved skoo and when I went to pick her up, she didn't want to get into the car. I was so relieved. She did great both days and I think I'll like the time alone.

Unfortunately, she has not been able to go back since last Wednesday. She started with a runny nose, hacking cough and sneezing last week. We saw the doctor on Thursday and she tested her for strep. She was negative for that and was diagnosed as having a cold. We hung around home for the most part during the weekend and Monday, she was ready for skoo. Right before we left the house, she sneezed. And lots of green snot came out of her nose.

I thought the teacher had told me that green snot meant cannot go to school. I was unsure of what to do because she seemed fine otherwise. She had no fever and was excited to go. I had to bring my dad to get his truck at the body shop a few miles away from her school so he was with us. I decided to park and go inside to talk to the secretary. She said to keep her home so, we did. As the day went on, she started getting worse and we made an appointment with her doctor for 2:15.

The doctor checked her ears and her right one was infected. Not badly infected but infected. Then, when she was checking her throat, she noticed an ulcer on her tongue. I showed her some tiny bumps on her cheek/mouth. She started checking her hands and feet and lo and behold, she had another bump on her foot. She diagnosed her with hand, foot and mouth disease. She warned me that it could get really bad and she may get them all in her throat. She may not eat, she may be in a lot of pain, etc. I drove home dreading the next few days.

Monday night was not good. She ran a low grade fever, developed more bumps on her tongue and was very fussy. She didn't want to take her antibiotic (for ear infection) and Tylenol and etc and that was a snotty, screaming battle. She did sleep well that night though, until 4:30am, when she woke up with a fever and thirsty. She was back asleep by 5 and slept until 8.

Tuesday morning and during the day, she was great. We stayed home and did laundry, colored and played with magnets. She didn't develop any new bumps and the ones she already had were nearly gone. After Tuesday's nap, she was not in the best of moods. She may have been in some pain and was just restless and fussy. She got some (chewable! HALLELUJAH!!) Tylenol and slept great.

Today, she has been fine. She woke up in a great mood and I saw no bumps on her at all. I called the doctor's office and they said that she must've just had a very mild case and that she wasn't contagious any more. I decided to keep her out of school any way and so I called them to let them know. Well, the director isn't there this week and her second in command didn't know hf&m disease. I was a little put off by her attitude and by the attitude of some others who acted like they've 1)never heard of hf&m and 2)like she has AIDS or leprosy.

I'm all for protecting yourself and your children but there are nice, inconspicuous ways of doing so without being rude, hurtful and dramatic. Kids get sick. They get weird rashes and bugs and worms and poops and and and. It is normal. It happens. It doesn't mean any one is dirty or unhealthy or BAD. And YOUR PRECIOUS CHILD is NOT better than mine because mine has hf&m. Ahem, can ya'll tell this hit a nerve?????

So, anyway, today, we had lunch with Paw (my dad) and then went to Target. And boy was I so glad we did. They had awesome stuff in the dollar aisle. If you're a frequent Target-er, like we are, you know that you always start in the dollar aisle. Sometimes you get really lucky and sometimes it's just "eh". Today, I got luckier than I've ever gotten. There was tons of really cute Halloween and Fall stuff, for the house and for Sugar. Then, there was tons of Sesame Street stuff for Sugar's party!!! I got sticker books, plates and cups (plastic to keep), tote bags, socks and I don't remember what else for favors/decoration. WHOOO HOOOO!!!

So, that's been September, in a nutshell.

This Stuff Never Happens to Daddy

I'm going to attempt to tell ya'll what happened to me today in the WalM*rt bathroom. I seriously doubt my ability to recount it adequately but I'm going to try. If you're a man (what man reads this blog? none) or anyone who is grossed out by menstruation related stories, this isn't the story for you.

So, Sugar and I are at WM, shopping for schools supplies for her Mother's Day Out. She needs wax paper and disposable gloves, Lysol, paper towels and wipes. No crayons, glue sticks, construction paper or other fun stuff. We are there, after lunch, and... well, ya'll know I'm on this diet, right? I eat A LOT of fruits, vegetables, Larabars, etc and it's made me, um, very, regular. Got it? Ok, so, I get the urge in the middle of shopping at the WM.

I make my way over to the back restrooms (in electronics) and take Sugar and my purse but leave the buggy(number 3). Sugar had taken off her shoes prior to the stop so let's remember that she's barefoot and we are GOING INTO THE (gross yuck eww) BATHROOM. AT THE WalM*RT!! No one else was in there when we ranwalked inside. I went into the very large, handicapped stall and saw that they had the "little seat." The little seat is a little plastic seat that has straps that you can plonk the baby down in while you are doing your business. It's saved me before when I had to go to the potty and Sugar couldn't walk/stand.

Sugar gets plonked into the seat, mommy gets onto the potty. Now, Sugar is very vocal lately, have I mentioned that? And she starts saying, "Mommy! Tee tee, mommy? Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Tee tee?" And of course I say, "Yes, honey, mommy tee tee." "Mommy POO POO? EWWWWWW, Mommy! POO POO YUCK!"

Once I sat down, I realized that I had a whole other problem aside from having to poo poo in the WM bathroom. I'm also having my period and it is heavy. I changed my purse over the weekend and forgot to put my stash of (super, extra, ultra) tampons in the new bag. Welllll, I realized once I sat down on the throne that I really needed one of those things. I remembered that I had this in my purse. There was a tampon in the kit. YAY!!

Yeah, it didn't work. The plastic applicator was CRAP and didn't do it's job. SIIIIIIGH. By this time, Sugar is not happy. "MOMMY! No, poo poo! Me down, Mommy, peeeesss. Out! Out! Out!" And I'm trying to use this emergency tampon and use the cheap, thin, insufficient WM toilet paper... I'm finally successful and get my pants back up and Sugar off of the "little seat."

By this time, I'm sweating A LOT. I have Sugar, my purse and I need to wash my hands. We round the stalls toward the sinks and UGH! There are a bunch of free standing sinks, no counter!!!!!!!!!!! I quickly decide to put Sugar into the sink next to the one I'm going to use. The water works on a sensor so it comes on when I put her down! I stand her up so she can kinda straddle the faucet with her legs on either side of it. This way, she won't get soaked while I try to clean myself up and get it together.

Of course, she thinks the water is awesome so she's bending over trying to turn on the water. I'm trying to wash my hands and pat my sweaty face but can't even have 5 seconds to do that!! I pick her up and grab some paper towels (which are just sitting on top of the dispenser. Those couldn't have worked on a sensor, I guess) and dry my hands and face. At this point, I am thinking that my husband would never have to deal with this. He wouldn't know HOW to deal with this.

So, that's my story. I just told the internets that I had to poop and that I'm having my period. Oh well, I guess. This is my life. Aren't you jealous?

Getting Control

I'm dieting again. I'm counting calories using the Lose It app on my iphone and I'm not eating carbs at night. I'm doing cardio and Pilates on Monday and Thursday mornings with Betsy and I'm thinking of doing bootcamp on Tuesday and Thursday evenings starting in September. I don't mind exercising, it's just finding the time and finding something to do with Sugar.

Since Monday, I've lost 4 pounds. That has gotten me really motivated. The thing is, I've gained 15-17 pounds since March. And I was very overweight in March! So, right now, I'm working to just get back to my previous weight. Any progress helps me to continue. I am feeling very motivated right now and for that I am grateful.

I am an emotional eater. I fear that I am addicted to food, especially carbs. My grandfather has ALS and that has really colored everything in our lives. It's absolutely devastating to watch someone so strong, vital and healthy disappear in front of your eyes. It's so agonizing to miss someone when they are physically still here. My grandmother, to whom I am very close, is having such a hard time with it all, too, of course. Taking care of, worrying about and loving them is of great priority and it's very emotional.

To deal with the ugly, sad, depressing details- I eat. But I CANNOT be so out of control anymore. I'm doing no carbs at night to try and break me from my carb addiction. I don't know if I'll ever do no carbs but I don't want to be SO addicted to them anymore. The nights have been rough but I'm DOING IT and I'm OK! I'm better than ok, actually.

I'm Not A Great Blogger

OK, let me see if I can just do a "brain dump" to catch ya'll up on what's been going on over here.

• Sugar is 22 months old and has been talking up a storm. She says something new and funny every day. She says "Peees" and "Cank You" pretty regularly and I'm trying to start her on ma'am and sir. Well, actually, I've been pushing the ma'am more because I AM a ma'am and I'm with her all day. It's important to me to instill this in her. It was a big deal in my house growing up and I have to admit that when a child says "yeah" it's a turn off.
• Sugar will be 2 years old on October 17. Her party will be October 23 at The Little Gym at 2:30. I'm doing a Sesame Street theme and I'm SO excited about it. TLG provides paper products and the room is already decorated in primary colors so it should be "easy" to decorate the tables using this theme. I plan to decorate the tables, put centerpieces (using a lot of the SS stuffed toys that she has), balloons, etc. I have found some really cute things on Etsy for favors and decor. And I just ordered her outfit! Now, I need to think of what food we will have. Suggestions for food at a Sunday party at 2:30? Thanks!
• I'm dieting again. I started doing Pilates with my mom and SIL's personal trainer and she is WONDERFUL. I've known her for many, many years and have always loved and admired her. Her name is Betsy and she's the sweetest, prettiest lady you ever want to know. She's classy and kind and friendly. Anyway, I'm counting calories (using the Lose It app on my iphone) and doing no carbs at night. Anyway, we'll see how it goes.
• I have noticed that my hair has been fabulous lately. I mean, I know that's conceited and all but it's true. It's thick and shiny and it does exactly what I want it to do. Seriously, it's never looked better. I'm also fatter than I've ever been (except when I was pregnant) so I've deduced that being fat=great hair. I'm prepared to give up the fabulous hair! I think.
• Sugar and I are going to meet my GA SIL in Panama City Beach in a few weeks. I'm SUPER excited because I LOVE the beach and I LOVE auntie Hay. Hay and I have had a very complicated relationship. I met her when she was about 14 years old and we've definitely been through a lot together. I absolutely love her like a sister and am SO proud of her. She's the same age as my little brother (26 1/2). I just wish she'd get married and have some babies and move here!!
• I bought one of Erin Condran's Life Planners for 2011-2012. I saw them and absolutely loved the look of it but couldn't spend $50 on one. Then Plum District had a deal where you pay $25 and get $50 worth of stuff from Erin Condran so I snapped it up and bought my LP. The day after I ordered, Erin Condran's website was hacked into and all of their orders were deleted. But, the customer service was wonderful and I got my LP in good time. I ordered the fleur feliz in splash and I love it. I want to order some note pads soon, too.
• Today, mom, Sugar and I are going to try lunch at one of the local food trucks. We didn't even know that our area had them until I read about them on Twitter. Man, I really love Twitter. I have met lots of great people, gotten in some fun debates, learned some great stuff about restaurants, attractions, places around me that I never knew existed. Ya'll should all Twitter. And follow me (@ shoeaddict17)!

Chrome

I changed to Google Chrome and now I don't know how to put pictures from other sites onto here. Anyone want to tell me how, I'd appreciate it.

The Ear Saga

I have always had issues with my ears. When I was young, I had lots of infections, tubes in and out and in and out and... As an adult, my ears overproduce wax, they are itchy and prone to aches. I've also had issues with vertigo because of all of this. My ENT prescribed this oil to put in my ears when they are itchy and it usually helps.

On Saturday, my ear (right) was very itchy and bothersome so, I put some of the oil in there and DID.NOT.SCRATCH.WITH.A.Q-TIP. In the middle of the night, the ear began to hurt. It got worse and worse as the night went on and by early Sunday morning, I knew I had to be seen. It was such a strange combination of itching and aching that I was afraid there was a BUG in it. (Hello, Brokedown Palace)

There is an after hours clinic open everyday at 9am right across the street from the church we go to. I got us dressed and dropped Sugar at the nursery at church and handed her beeper off to my parents who were in church. I went across the street to be seen by the doctor. And get the roach out of my ear!

There was no other patients there at 11am on Sunday morning so I was seen right away. The doctor looked in my left ear first, for comparison(?), then looked in my right one. He said, "Eeee!" And I said, "Is it a roach?" No roach (or any other bugs) but the inner ear was infected with lots of fluid behind the ear drum AND the canal was infected, too. He offered a few different courses of action including antibiotics, steroid shot, steroid/antibiotic ear drops, pain meds, etc. I took the drops and the antibiotics and was on my way. At this point, it hurt, was uncomfortable but not at all unbearable and wasn't even constant.

By Sunday night, that all changed. It was a rough, long night and by Monday morning, I was miserable. I took a nap with Sugar and when we woke up, it was much worse. I brought Sugar to my mom's house (Blue was out of town. Isn't that always the case) and went back to the after hours clinic. I'd been whining about the pain on Twitter (@shoeaddict17) and to everyone near me and kept getting asked about numbing drops. I needed those drops.

I went to the clinic, no makeup, yoga pants and t-shirt, dirty hair (I was afraid of the water in the ears!) and I didn't even care. Too much. I told the doctor that I was in lots of pain and needed some relief. He checked the ear again and said that it was very infected, swollen and all that. He gave me a shot of antibiotics, numbing drops and pain meds. I went back to my mom's house, ate some food (very gingerly because it hurt to bite), took Advil and hoped for the best.

That night, Sugar and I spent with mom and it was another awful night. The pain got worse and worse and worse. I actually writhed in pain. I read The Hunger Games (the whole thing) and alternated Advil and the pain meds and the numbing drops. Nothing worked. I got no relief. I slept a very little bit in the early morning and that was it. When I woke up it was a lot worse.

I (barely) drove us home and sat in my chair. Sugar was AN ANGEL all day (actually the whole time I was sick). I took a pain pill at 10am and that managed to ease some of the pain from 11am-2pm. I slept a little bit while Sugar napped and woke up in pain again. I kept alternating the pain meds and Advil (the pain med has acetaminophen) and it was manageable at the meds' peaks.

I watched a bunch of Bravo TV that night while Sugar slept. The pain meds stopped working at about 2am and I was back in major, writhing pain again. I was laying in my bed, in the dark, crying and praying and tossing and turning. At about 4am, I heard a pop and liquid started coming out of the ear. The pressure and the major pain stopped and I knew my ear drum had ruptured. I got some sleep after that.

In the morning, I called to get an appointment with my ENT but she's in surgery on Wednesdays. My friend told me she'd get me in with her ENT and she did. She also offered to drive us because I was very dizzy since the rupture. She drove Sugar and I to the doctor's office and completely took care of us. My husband, parents and grandparents were all out of town and so her TLC was so welcome!

The ENT came in and checked my ear. He said that the canal was so swollen that he couldn't see my ear drum. He said that if I heard a pop and had liquid drain, then it was a rupture. He put a sponge wick in the canal to help draw the antibiotic drops into the middle of the ear. He gave me more pain meds, a shot of cortisone and wanted to change my oral antibiotic. There was discussion because the one he wanted to prescribe isn't good for children. And Sugar is still nursing at night. There was no way that we could not nurse at night without Blue here. I took the script and told him I'd see what happened.

My friend took me to the grocery store so I could get some provisions for us and the the pharmacy. By this time, I wasn't it too much pain anymore but was a little woozy from all the pain meds and very tired. Sugar and I ate soup for dinner and we were in bed early. BUT, the cortisone shot, I was hot and flushed and not tired at all (suddenly. At 10pm.) So, I watched TV and didn't worry too much about it.

Yesterday, I felt much better and had my first day with relatively no pain. The canal is still swollen and irritated. It still itches and that gets a little aggravating. When it itches really badly and I try to scratch, that makes it hurt. I try to just leave it alone. No pain meds in a full 24 hours since this morning!

... I feel a slight ache in the left ear this morning...